#BlogElul 23 — Unexpected Awakening

by Rebecca Einstein Schorr on 10 September 2012 @ 2:03 pm

I didn’t feel it during S’lichot.
That feeling.
The one that signals a stirring in my soul.
An awakening. Or, perhaps, a reawakening.

I’m not surprised.

It is hard to be the Jew in the Pew after being at the helm of the spiritual ship.
And in an unfamiliar place with unfamiliar words and unfamiliar melodies…
(Not to mention the early hour.)
I am not surprised.

But what was unexpected was where and when I felt it.
That flutter.
That awakening. That reawakening.

Not in the shul.
Not during S’lichot.
Not in community. Or even in prayer.

My weary soul began its annual journey
in my kitchen.
Yesterday.
While preparing the golden, silky chicken broth.

What does it mean to find this connectedness in such an ordinary place?
What does it mean to lack this connectedness in a seemingly-holy place?

I suppose I should be comforted by the fact that my soul has been awakened.
And I am.
But these High Holy Days had always been my most favorite time of year.
Now, they just make me miss home. A home that exists only in my memory.

At least the soup is delicious…

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This post is part of #BlogElul — a project, created and oordinated by The Ima, in preparation for the start of the New Year, Rosh Hashanah. Feel free to head over to her place and thank her for dreaming up such a creative way for us to consider the different themes associated with the Jewish High Holy Days.

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

1 JanetheWriter 10 September 2012 @ 3:33 pm at 3:33 pm

Holidays are hard when they aren’t as they’ve always been. I know…

Perhaps when they are over we should make a date…a fine beginning to the new year.

xoxo.

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2 Mary 10 September 2012 @ 3:35 pm at 3:35 pm

Thank you–

I’ve never commented on your blog before, but today felt like the day. Just wanted you to know how much your candor and your continual willingness to reflect out loud is appreciated. Not everyone leads such an examined life–you make it look easy šŸ™‚

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3 Irene 10 September 2012 @ 7:35 pm at 7:35 pm

That must be some soup! (I knew you’d find that reawakening.) Our service was very nice. It finished with a shofar blast just after midnight and the recommendation that we go to the car without saying a word to anyone. The emotion in the room, even from from many folks who hadn’t been there before, was palpable.

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